we're the real cool kids from the other side of town

October 16 – Just saw a young girl from probably middle school or something in an all pink getup with a backpack larger than her go up to the door, bang on it, go to the window, yell. She then proceeded to walk around the house yelling and banging whenever or wherever she felt it would do some good. After a few minutes of this she walked around the block and did it all over again. This time somebody let her in.

She was probably there around 15 minutes and walked away happier than a clam (is that the saying?)

Should I go over and knock on the door and scream too? I want to be a cool kid.


and be happier than a clam....they're dang wonderful.

advertise

October 12th

I am going to make business cards for my website on www.vistaprint.com and head down to the police station. Then I am going to flyer all their cars…is this illegal? I’ll have to ask an officer while I’m there I guess. If he says no, I’ll shove them in his pocket and run away screaming, “I’m not the one you want…check out my crazy neighbors!!!! THE BURGBURBS DAMNIT.”

Think it will work? If I get arrested, will you bail me out?

darnit

October 11th – Crap ass…am I a bad person for being upset that their electric is not, in fact, shut off?

Anyway, they just covered their windows with black garbage bags and tin foil, I bet it isn’t even Reynold’s wrap…I bet it’s from big lots or something (I always purchase the store brand, myself)

I wonder why anyone would want to put that crap all over the windows to keep any light from escaping their domicile. I can understand the bedrooms, but the living room? Suspicious much?

October 10th – crazy neighbors times two. Nick just got here for dinner (7 p.m.) and we were alerted they were up and around by several high pitched screams. I looked through the window and saw this girl in a red tube top run to a black truck, run inside, run out (loud scream), run in, run out (loud scream) and then say “Shut up, Angela.”

I walked outside under the guise of getting my mail and heard the scream again, it was definitely a toddler, most likely named Angela. I also noticed my good neighbor Wally was also outside trying to figure out what the hell was going on. Wally rocks.

Several minutes later when I look out again after perusing a stupid website I see tube top girl riding piggyback around the yard on some guy’s back. He’s a baller.

They just now drove away in the truck without Angela. Lucky little girl. She’s better off alone, than with these bastards.

Electric still seems to be off.

October 6th - I think they lost their electricity. Their door is now always open and there are never any lights on. When they need light, they just park a car in front of the house and shine the beams indoors. Crafty huh? I think so. I love DIY electricity. Screw Progress Energy (sorry Jon), who needs em?

Also I wonder, why don’t the strays go inside…they try to run in my house every time the door opens and I have 3 dogs at the moment. I guess the cats just know my house is full of warmth (or air conditioning) and love (or working light bulbs). Maybe I don’t want to know why cats won’t even delve into their dwelling. I imagine something icky though.

Pym needs to gain some weight. I feed him more than I feed Azreal…

multiple choice

October 5th – J87 XSC green minivan.

Last night there was definitely a shindig. It started around 2pm and went until about 2am. Their front door was open the entire time…. in this heat??! You’d have to be mad to live without air conditioning, or perhaps doped up. I am thinking the latter as there was more suspicious lighter action on the porch as soon as the sun went down. Makes you wonder, is it

A. Pot
B. Crystal meth
C. Or crack

No idea. I am not sure of the major differences on lighter techniques amongst the three, but I’ll be sure to wikipedia it later. Also, little Pym made an appearance and got some food.

Imposter cop car

October 2nd – Busy week. No cops, but they were definitely smoking pot on the front steps. Must have been one guy and a few girls….may have spoken too soon, a white car just pulled up and three people walked out to it…might be a cop car, but am not sure. Am going to investigate Rear Window style from the guest bedroom.

Not a cop car, just an imposter cop car. Also, right after they left, a truck with four doors, possibly dark green showed up and a bunch of people got into that with sleeping bags. They also chased my black kitten around and some guy with a white shirt finally caught it. I hope Pym is okay. On a side note about he neighborhood cats, I finally met the grey and white one. Very fluffy, and quite skittish but nice once he/she comes up. Is now outside eating all of the cat food I set out. Good for Greyball.

Oh and again, definitely pot, they’re coughing and laughing hysterically. Jerks…bothering my cats.

 


I wish these people were my neighbors. 


October 1st - I wrote down some license numbers…. I regrettably threw them out while cleaning out my purse (on back of receipts)…one black truck (obviously work truck) one red Cadillac (I believe they live there) and one white Honda??? I couldn’t see the last as well, but wrote the numbers and letters down quickly….only to lose them later in a purse-cleaning sweep.


5 a.m. – just saw two cops outside…. seems more domestic. Is now 4:58 and am not sure when they arrived. I am worried that since they keep seeing me outside when the cops come, that they will think I have called them. I have not…as I said, seems more domestic both times when cops have arrived, yet I believe they are selling something illegal…who has 15 friends that come repeatedly? I believe only drug dealers do.

September 15th: Dear god they have a small child. It was left outside for 10 long minutes (I was watching to make sure he (she?) was okay.) The argument was going on between white car man and skinny pre-pubescent looking female. Started outside…then they left the toddler outside and took their troubles indoors. Nick was here and he alerted me to the altercation. Damn them.


I wish I could see license plates because I’d have about 15 by now….maybe they’re very friendly people. I tried to write down a few, but didn’t want to seem suspicious.

I’d also like to note there is a family of amazing black cats living in their yard. I want the kitten, but my cat is a nightmare and would most likely kill it. Damn her…but I must keep her, as I am the only one she trusts. I hate Azreal…yet love her. I have named small black kitten Pym after the only complete Poe novel.

neighbor intro

License plates: I am a bad person, I lost them all.

Cop Arrivals:

(That I’ve seen)

Arrived home from Pennsylvania (August 29^th?) 3 cop cars

Distinctly heard, “My baby’s in that car”

Retort, “no it isn’t, it’s in the house”

“I know, I just don’t want them to come back”

cops arrive within a minute

neighbor next door (right next door – grunt man) also outside….we are both perplexed, confused, and interested. There is a reason I love the movie The Burbs. Seems like a domestic call though and not drugs as one would assume, also neighbor lady wore terrifyingly short shorts in which she picked an enormous wedgie in front of male cop…not enticing to any sex. What the hell is going on over there?